Monday, November 19, 2007
The Opposite of Thankful
I've been working on a post for a few days now, sort of the opposite of my "Bite me" post. It seemed like the right time of year to talk about the people who have really gone above and beyond for us since we lost Owen and how we truly do have so many things to be thankful for. I was hoping to finish it up and get it up today, but I woke up this morning in a funk and I'm just not in a thankful place. I know what brought it on and I guess I have only myself to blame. I've been reading birth stories online. I read one last night that was just beautiful. She described feeling her baby slide out of her and then hearing the baby cry for the first time. I can't get it out of my head. I read it and all I could think is how badly I wanted that. The feeling of birthing Owen is still so vivid and so is the terrible silence that followed. I'm definitely not thankful for that.