Monday, June 30, 2008

Irony or Something Like It

Back in November or December, when we first consulted with our current midwifery practice, they had mentioned possible induction at 37 weeks in a subsequent pregnancy. Without realizing it, I grabbed on to that as my saving grace. Somehow surviving to 37 weeks seemed much more manageable than any other option. However, once I became pregnant, I never actually looked at the calendar to figure out the date.

So at my appointment this morning, I brought it up again just to discuss where I was mentally. As we were talking, C (the midwife) got out her calendar and looked at it. Her face just fell and she reached out and put her hand on my leg. "Ashleigh, I don't think you are going to want to do that." She showed me the calendar.

37 weeks falls on July 30. The same day Owen was born.

How could I have missed that? I know in the grand scheme of things, its probably not as big a deal as I am making it out to be, but it feels like one more blow from a universe that appears not to be on my side at all.


G said...

Wow. Just wow.

What's your alternative plan?

k@lakly said...

I think you can look at it from another perspective, that of having something wonderful to celebrate on that sad day, a gift from Owen, maybe.
I know there are others out here who started trying around two to three months after the loss which put them, if successful, in the same position, delivering right around the one year anniversary.
It will all be bittersweet, no matter when they hand you that beautiful baby, you just have to decide(easier said than done, I know) what will be the easiest on your heart.

CLC said...

I know it sounds like a bad omen, but I agree with Kalakaly. I was supposed to have my c-section on Dec. 26th, which is the anniversary of my Dad's death. I know it's not the same thing, but I thought it was a special date and nice that I could turn a sad day into a happy day. Of course, I never got my chance for that, but that's how I chose to look at it.

Is it possible to push it to August 1 or 2nd if it's too upsetting for you?

Clarissa said...

Have you considered just waiting till the baby decides its birthday? Would there be any medical reason for the induction?

I know it seems unbearable - I'm at 37 weeks and wish he came out 5 weeks ago!

But I also think I will get what I get when I get it. I just hope its sooner than 40 weeks :) But most all, I hope he's healthy and happy.

niobe said...

I know the feeling.

c. said...

Wow. That is some coincidence, Ashleigh. I was thinking the same thing as K@lakly about going forth with the induction and having something to celebrate that day. Easier said than done, I'm sure.

Thinking of you.

Monica C. said...

How about waiting until 37.5 or 38 weeks? I lost Jimmy at 40 weeks and 3 days and in my subsequent pregnancy I was induced at 38 weeks and 3 days. We could have done 38 weeks exactly, but on the off chance that dates were wrong, I threw in a few extra days. It was hard, but if I could wait 23 months to finally get a live baby from the moment I conceived with Jimmy, a few extra days would not matter, and they went by fast. Oh.. and I had a super ultrasound two days before that helped ease my mind. But I get it if you want to go sooner. I really get it. I also agree with other posters, it could be a gift from Owen, to share his special day with the new baby.

Holli said...

Wow, I really don't have anything to say.

charmedgirl said...

july 30th is my birthday too.

i think that whatever YOU decide to do will be right. only you can find the reasons why it would or wouldn't be.

i don't know if this is wrong to say, but i wish i could have another baby on paige's birthday.

Azaera said...

don't feel too bad, this baby is due on Sophie's exact death day.. Jan 17. I like to think Sophie is watching over this baby and trying to make sure that it's okay.. at first i was unsettled by it.. but I'm trying to see it in a positive light

Ange said...

That it quite a coincidence. I guess I feel like I would want to keep that day a little seperate. So Owen has his very own day. But then again I see the point of turning that day into a happier day. Knowing me if they started the induction process I would not give birth for a day or so anyway. Either way the time is fast approaching till you meet your new little one. How lovely.