July

Owen,
It is once again July.  It sneaks up on me now. I lose track of the days and then find myself short-tempered, emotional, angry and just plain tired.  As always, it takes me longer that it should to piece together why. I should be used to this by now. I should know that just as the days get hotter and we start to relax into summer, I will stumble back into this place. A place where you are so close to me and yet so very far away. I will come back here to sit with you on my mind and in my heart, but never in my arms.

In 15 days, it will have been 6 years since I held you in my arms. Today every one of them feels like a lifetime.